banter
Football rivalries are simple enough to understand: any team in the nearby vicinity must be considered more detestable than all slightly less local enemies.
This battle for territory is no greater than in London, where hatred is divided up between numerous clubs.
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While Tottenham historically consider Arsenal their greatest rivals, we bet they hold more disdain for Chelsea than anyone, or indeed anything, right now.
It all began in 1967, with Tottenham’s victory over Chelsea in the FA Cup final, and it might not feel like it, but that’s far from Spurs’ only success over their annoying neighbours.
They beat the Blues to First Division survival in 1975 and overcame them in the League Cup final in 2008.
But Chelsea, the most successful English club of this millennium, are never slow to remind Tottenham of their long trophy drought since then.
What started out as a rivalry characterised by hooliganism and violence has since become something gloriously petty.
Remember when Chelsea posted a top 14 of the Premier League table on Twitter, just so Spurs would be last?
And fresh off the back of their Champions League triumph in 2021, the Blues turned the trolling up a notch.
That trophy was paraded around Stamford Bridge later that summer, right before the visit of Tottenham in a pre-season ‘friendly’.
It gave Chelsea the perfect opportunity to celebrate their incredible success in front of Tottenham – and the Blues faithful, of course. Coincidence? We think not.
The timing certainly wasn’t lost on Chelsea legend John Terry, who responded to the news on Instagram with a string of laughing, clapping and trophy emojis.
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That was just a couple of months after Terry, acting as assistant coach for Aston Villa, lifted a pretend trophy in front of Spurs fans during a match at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium.
Chelsea winning the Champions League always comes with the added bonus of Spurs banter, the same was true last time in 2012.
Having finished outside the top four, the Blues replaced fourth-place Tottenham in the 2012/13 tournament as a result of their victory over Bayern Munich.
The hero from that night, Didier Drogba, is one of the rivalry’s protagonists: the legendary striker told compatriot Serge Aurier he joined the wrong club when Tottenham signed him.
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Mocking the north Londoners is the easiest way to a Chelsea fan’s heart - and the players are in on the act.
Eden Hazard wrote himself into Blues folklore with that goal to end Tottenham’s Premier League title bid and confirm Leicester as champions in 2016.
A ferocious game, suitably dubbed the Battle of the Bridge, ended with Hazard curling one into the top corner and celebrating right in front of the Spurs fans.
The Belgian also scored a brilliant goal to boot Spurs out of the FA Cup in the semi-finals the following season, and left England with his mission completed…
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“We won a lot of trophies, they have not, so I hope this continues,” he said in 2019, before joining Real Madrid.
But perhaps nobody loves teasing Tottenham as much as Willian, so much that he had to join Arsenal upon leaving Stamford Bridge.
As the song goes, Spurs bought his flight, but Willian, he saw the light, he got the call from Abramovich, and off he went to Stamford Bridge. And he hates Tottenham, he hates Tottenham, etc.
Antagonistic as it sounds, it’s actually a pretty accurate account of what happened with the Willian deal.
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Tottenham had it all wrapped up and even completed his medical, before Chelsea swooped in and hijacked the deal.
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Spurs fans can, at least, have a giggle at Barcelona doing exactly that to the Blues this summer with Raphinha and Jules Kounde.
And perhaps Antonio Conte's side, revamped after a positive transfer window, will be able to get some revenge at Stamford Bridge on Sunday.